REGIONAL HOSPICE AND HOME CARE OF WESTERN CT

" Regional Hospice and Home Care of Western Connecticut was a disgrace to deal with and I regret the day the "professionals" from this organization began in-home care for my relative. Their incompetence and unprofessionalism was astounding and I was embarrassed for them. They had no seeming awareness of the fact that they were essentially guests in the home of people who were grieving caregivers. One RN was flippant and coarse and would arrive without even calling first. She took phone calls on several personal cell phones and talked about the details of her calls as I sat in astonishment at her casual attitude as if this was a social visit. Her "explanation" of the very important medications was rudimentary, totally unorganized, presented very poorly and not at all accurate. She even mislabeled one medication the patient was taking. Fortunately we saw her mistake and corrected it ourselves. Another RN was a bully from the start and had no clue how to deal with a family who was doing their very best to care for an ill family member who was dying too young. We were working so hard and she reveled in literally criticize everything we did and everything we said which I found inappropriate and obnoxious since I knew how to speak to the person I was caring for and knew my entire life. We were treated like children and as if we were idiots. She was so extremely hyperactive, very demanding and controlling. We did not understand (with her either) where the philosophy of Hospice was. There was ZERO COMPASSION AND ZERO RESPECT for us as the family members. We had headaches each time she visited and reigned over us correcting everything and ridiculing us when we, in reality, had gone above and beyond in our caring for our relative. No one who knows us, including the family doctor, would have agreed with her treatment of us and nitpicking and constant, unrelenting taunting of us with "errors" that did not even exist. instead of making life less stressful, this Hospice made it even more stressful. The complete opposite of what friends in other states said Hospice is like. The social worker was so unprofessional in how she talked with us that it was, frankly appalling. They all seemed to be on "power trips" oblivious to our real problems and unable to provide us with the explanations, proper resources, suggestions and compassion (a Hospice tenant) we desperately needed. At one point the social worker and nurse just stared at each other when my elder family member expressed himself. Passive aggressive? I am a psychologist and could not believe these professionals were part of a Hospice agency. The arrogance, power plays and outright bullying belong nowhere in Hospice "care". It got worse and we are tormented by the fact that we did not have the time to find better help. Our grief is complicated by this Hospice experience and that is truly tragic. The financial aspect is too egregious to even write about here. With an hour's notice our relative was taken by ambulance to the Regional Hospice Center on Milestone Road in Danbury, CT. The person who made this decision was someone we never met and she was unavailable when called--- conveniently arranging the transfer just before she left for the day. All attempts to reach anyone besides an answering service send the caller into a circular phone play where an extension is never actually reached. It is just a circular game where the phone extension you hope to reach sends you right back into the general message. This happened on many occasions. Another common occurrence was having telephone messages never returned. We never called unless it was a very important issue we needed to answer to. Never had a single phone call returned by a social worker at the Regional Hospice center. The administrator named Nora is another power hungry bully who works on the patient unit. There are only twelve beds in the entire facility. We were quoted a price of $525 per day by the in- home RN/administrator and when my relative was admitted, the price became $550 per day. Do not be fooled by appearances. Glamour and an ever changing landscape of furniture and wall colors do not a quality Hospice make. Nothing we requested for our patient was granted and the patient requested it herself. Where is the "quality of life aspect of Hospice? It was completely missing except for the medications administered and the fact that meals arrived. There was no "quality of life"--another tenant of Hospice care people expect. We were once again ignored and treated as if neither our wishes nor those of the patient mattered. With hundreds of volunteers and twelve patients (at full census) I think some effort could have been made to give our loved one a fulfilling experience. As for spiritual guidance and counseling---we were also ignored by that department despite meeting a Chaplain who said he would meet with us regularly. No matter how many times we requested to see the Chaplain, we never saw him or heard from him again. When I asked an administrator about my contacting him, she loudly and tersely told me I was "not allowed" to contact him. Hard to believe these people are working at a Hospice but they are and they are paid well. I am taking the time and reliving the trauma this experience caused me (on top of my grief as it is) to warn other people about Regional Hospice. Even if your doctor refers you here (as any doctor connected with Danbury Hospital or a Westchester hospital might do), heed our nightmarish experiences. We are left bereft from guilt of ever accepting this agency into our home and entrusting our emotions and the health of our relative to them. The bottom line is this: MONEY AND IMAGE COME FIRST HERE. Do not think all the overly decorated and fancy living rooms and Architectural Digest magazines lying around mean this is a place where you will be cared for well or even cared for with respect. MONEY IS WHAT THEY WANT and it is the priority. If they know you are good for it, your relative will likely be transferred there rather than another facility and in the blink of an eye before you even realize what is happening. We lived through it and I would like to prevent others from experiencing the horrible Hospice experiences we had. There are other Hospices in the area. PLEASE CHECK THEM OUT and avoid this agency unless a one or two day stay and glamour is what your loved one and you want. Danbury Hospital has a Hospice unit as does St. Mary's Hospital and they are free. This place is like an overpriced hotel and their values are just out of line with what it means to care for patients and their suffering, emotionally spent family. To summarize..the place is simply "odd" to quote every family member from near and far who visited with us there. When I went to the kitchen to get a snack for my relative I was asked whether or not the soda and snack was for me or someone who was a patient. How dare you ask me such a thing? If I wanted to buy something from your kitchen I can certainly afford it and I found the question (under such intense emotional circumstances ---rude and insulting). Goodbye Regional Hospice and may anyone reading this learn from our mistake of trusting you while under such duress. It never got any better --only worse. How dare you for not even returning phone calls or caring about how we felt losing a beloved family member. How dare you not giving is the spiritual and psychological support and counseling we should have been given. I think Regional Hospice needs to drop the House Beautiful act and review what a real Hospice entails: respect, compassion, dignity, listening intently to the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of the patient and their family and providing support through counseling and efficient, effective professional communication. Another wall color or another couch will not make the rude and condescending power plays here any softer or acceptable. You all need to read the Hospice philosophy and try putting it into action. The only saving grace here was two nurses and two aides who seemed to understand where they worked. As for housekeeping, I watched the stain on the bathroom floor for a week before I washed the area myself. Please seek Hospice treatment that provides support and treats you all like suffering human beings paying for and expecting a decent plan of care and kindness. A Hospice that believes in "quality of life" in whatever time is left-- not one that ignores all needs but never misses a call about how much you owe them. My dissatisfaction with this Hospice cannot (and has not) been understated and I speak for every member of my large extended family who dreaded walking into the place, handing over driver's licenses, requiring neon orange ID badges and being let in through the locked doors by a volunteer. The place is run by volunteers doing jobs paid employees would be doing but I suspect the administrators are doing well financially at $550 per day for custodial care and nothing else. There are also security cameras everywhere and a feeling of "home" is simply not possible when one is literally being watched from every angle even on the decks off patient's rooms. What are they watching? It was unnerving to have these cameras everywhere and added to a sense of prison rather than a Hospice. If I have helped one family avoid the turmoil we are went through and continue to experience due to our unknowing doctor's referral to Regional Hospice, my efforts to warn you will not be in vain. I wish you well on your quest to find caring, quality help for your ill loved one. It is not here. "